When I think about the motivation to go from napper to non-napper, I can't really blame him, as most days he has only woken up from his nap a few hours before bedtime. Plus, the statement "when Micah is napping can we..." which had previously fallen unto the naive ears of a toddler, now come across to Micah as "we have so much fun when you are sleeping!!!"
Since we began noticing his recent habit of after-bedtime wanderings and saying "but I am not tired", we tried waking him up early from nap a few times. We thought that taking a shorter nap might prevent the little guy from quietly padding down the stairs every five minutes for an hour and a half after lights out. I firmly believe that waking up a starving bear early from hibernation is probably more enjoyable than spending the second half of the day with a half-napped preschooler!
I am torn because I like nap time. It hits right when I am having a lull in my personal energy level. I can read to the older children and the chapter makes sense because it isn't interrupted fourteen times in the span of eight pages. We even take to doing some handicrafts, and other projects with either teeny tiny pieces or requiring super sharp implements. And is the only three hour stretch each day when I don't have to be afraid of the house growing quiet. (Quiet with little boys usually means trouble... and in Micah's case, it usually means toilet water.)
On the other hand, it will be nice to be have more flexibility in the afternoons. I imagine he will nap every few days as he transitions, or maybe squeeze in car naps if we go somewhere in the afternoons. In all honestly, it seems a little surreal to think that there are no longer babies or toddlers in our house. In ten years of parenting we have never not had any nappers, or babies, or toddlers. This is a whole new world for us.
I am finding myself feeling a little anxious about it all. Silly, huh? The thoughts of "what will I do to keep him productively occupied during the time he used to be sleeping" and "how will I fit in a rest for my second wind" are whirling in my head. There is a twinge of bittersweet emotion as I reflect on the "lasts", the baby phase being over, and the uncertain steps ahead.
No matter the naps, the questions, the longings, I do know that God is good. I and thankful to know that He has ordained this time for me to grow into the likeness of His Son, Jesus Christ. I am reminded of what the scriptures say, helping me to keep perspective, that while these emotions and changes are a surprise to me, they are not to the One who brought them.
For we are His workmanship,
created in Christ Jesus for good works,
which God prepared beforehand,
that we should walk in them.
Ephesians 2:10
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